GUH! It’s definitely a Monday morning. Who authorized this shit? I think we need at least three more days in a holiday. There are more than enough of us to all work and make things happen. The only issue is that those that don’t want to work ever are still out there and have no idea how to actually put in a hard days worth of work so that we can ALL play more. Oh well…. Really I’m just bitching from having to wake up at all this morning. None the less before I was good and ready too. Also my morning coffee which is usually sweet and creamy is somehow this morning obnoxiously acidic. I don’t know how mom and dad drink this stuff through a coffee pot.
Ok. I think I have enough time to go grab bacon if there is any. Or better coffee…. or something.
Coffee with chocolate in it isn’t quite so bad… Little on the sugary side, will have to do some burpees or rowing later to run that out of the system >.>
Gonna try to stay a full 8 at work today, see if I can do it. That’s out of here by 1530 and I normally leave at 1330. So let’s see. I’ve already been here roughly two hours and I get my first break here in about 5 minutes. Then I’ll tell myself I’m “starting” my day and see if we can’t trick ourselves into having a 6 hour day that starts then. It does put us back in the rest of our schedule but that should be ok. I’m just doing my best to try to be as awesome as I can from here on out. Save as many FMLA hours as I can. We’ll see how well it goes. I also didn’t bring my phone charger… bugger. Man today is starting to feel a little rough around the edges and I disapprove highly. Amazing how quick it can change.
I’m not the only one suffering through today as it’s not only a Monday but the Monday after a time change as well. Ugh! At least I currently haven’t been working on Sunday’s. That has been nice having the past few weekends off here. Overall I think my whole brain and processes have been starting to get better and better over the longer course of time. Though I think a lot more of that has to deal more with the self work, though the meds are also starting to aid. I still can’t believe how long it takes everything to level out and play together though.
Having a really hard time concentrating now so I think I’m just about going to wrap this up. Actually I should leave it open in case we are and likely are and yes I Have confirmation that we’re simply not wanting to write right in this minute. BUt that’s the nice thing about minutes is they continue to progress and if I wanted to I could sit for a while and just relax into the moments and let them pass slowly writing more and more and more until finally I can lull the others into a sense of comfort and sliiiiip past and forward and Hello and Good Afternoon all my Asher fans 😉
Well that was short lived… >.> I take over, Riven takes over aaaaaaand there goes my writing streak. Now we’re stuck secondary again though still writing. Yawning lots trying to come forward. I wish there was a way to describe the pressure of trying to walk into your own body from the back of your mind. Yes, it feels just as crazy as that sounds for one. Still super distracted. Contemplated doing another document or practice, but I don’t think I can get another one done in 15 minutes. Seriously I can’t even write a paragraph without my mind getting off topic. Getting to the end of a sentence just because I can type almost as fast as I can think and sometimes I can type just as fast which is nice. That’s how novels get written 😉 But I have to be in a really quiet and undisturbed setting for that to be able to take lace. I wonder which axiom gym I should go to today >.>
–Current Mood (Public Facing): Neutral,
–Current Real Mood: Mood is completely tanked. I feel as grey as the clouds that are looming dark over the mountains.
–Worst Area: Scattered thoughts. Long time loss. Absolutely 0 motivation to do anything. Like… none… Fuck this blog, other than I need to actually record on my bad days too. Bull shit.
–Loss of Time: Larger chunks. Something’s missing or not right but we’re out of sync with how we should be. Means that everything feels less real. Harder to make sense of what I’m supposed to be doing.
–Sleep: SHIT. Kept tossing and turning
Syl – ZONKED
Spitfyre – SHINY! O.o
Carbon – Let’s pick a direction today and drive.
Asher – I’ll agree with Carbon today, I bet we could make it to the ocean by just about sunrise tomorrow morning…. >.>
Riven – GODDAMNEDMESS!!! *looks around brain….*
Sylvia – This Armor is far too worn down for this.
Lyra – GONE atm. May as well not exist right now.
-Meds: Oxcarbazepine (300mg morning and night) Abrieva (2.5mg) last night. Aroma Therapy. mmmmm lavender ^.^